Looking Back – An Introduction

The thoughts on this page were originally entered in part elsewhere in the pieces that follow, but I have since realized that a little more detail might be helpful. If you’re wondering what this set of short papers is all about, it’s ancestry. Like most people, my life has flowed by on its own momentum, and during that time my attention has been primarily turned to the moment at hand. Oh, I’ve asked family questions from time to time, and even wondered about my ancestors but never in a concentrated way. That all changed as Leslie became interested in her ancestry and started asking Carol and me questions about her forebears. An expert researcher, she has become a deep well of information about Carol’s family and mine. That, in turn, sparked my interest in those Farleys and Hales and others who came before me.

As I searched my own memory, it occurred that I know very little about my grandparents and even less about their parents, and on back through time. Realizing this, I thought how interesting it would be to have a better understanding of who they were as people: what they did, what they liked, how they saw themselves, and other facets of their lives. But that’s not available and my guess is that very few people have that kind of information about their ancestors: mostly they know birth and death dates, names of parents and children, and perhaps their occupations. Rarely would most people know more than this kind of basic information. Of course, there are exceptions — a notable deed or misdeed of an ancestor would probably get lasting attention, as would works or actions that heavily influenced lives of others. But for the most part, the “inside story” of one’s life becomes lost within a generation or so.

With this in mind, and with gratitude to Leslie for the idea, I decided to pass along some of what I know and remember about my antecedents, as well as myself and my contemporaries. I confess that had I done this several years ago I could have provided more; as much as I don’t want to admit it, memory fades with age. I do this not so much for my children — although there is stuff here that will be new to them — rather, for their children and children’s children and beyond. I do this to give those younger than I some of what I couldn’t find about my own ancestors. This, in the hope that some distant day a Farley-Hale-Hopkins-Porter descendent will find information about his or her ancestry that would be otherwise unavailable. And that that knowledge might bring a small sense of satisfaction; even pleasure, perhaps.

By way of explanation, I should give you my thinking on “memories” as the term applies in this collection of “pieces.” You’ll note that I have written nothing about my own family — my beloved wife Carol, children and grandchildren. They are still here, they are part of my ongoing days, and I don’t think of them as “memories.”

In that regard, it is my hope, which I have expressed to them, that they will tell their own stories — in a manner that suits their individual styles. I’d love to think that Carol will tell the story of her family, and that Leslie and Patrick tell their tales about their grandparents and parents, along with memories of their own times.

Finally, I would add that these pages are about my life during my earlier years. You won’t find reference to my many dear friends who are part of my life today — as I said about my family, I don’t think of them as “memories,” since they are everyday companions all.

 Similarly, there are others in my life who are part of my everyday activities, and who are not, as I see it here, “memories.” Great friends all, and hopefully for a long time to come. Friends with whom I have travelled, gone fishing, enjoyed an evening of dinner and cards, visited at their homes, gone on cruises — all of that. It is a great pleasure to me to know that they’re still in “real time,” and I hope to see them often. None of what follows is astounding or noteworthy in an other-than-family sense. Don’t look here for deep insights or world view or a faraway look in my eyes. You won’t find anything profound or provocative — it is simply an unvarnished account of what I remember about people who were like most other people, living their lives as best they could. As your ancestors, they are part of you.